Monday, October 19, 2009

going out on a high note

My miscarriage ordeal is nearly over. Let's just say I'm not really paying attention anymore. I went in last Thursday for follow-up ultrasound and bloodwork. The u/s showed that I still had a little chunk o' tissue, but my blood level of HCG was down to 2000 so they weren't too concerned overall. I'm supposed to go back later this week for another blood draw and thankfully no u/s. I will not bore you with any more details, as I'm sick to death of it myself.

I'm still feeling gloomy, annoyed, and cranky a lot of the time. But there are more "silver lining" moments every day. Some tidbits, in no particular order..

  • I swell with pride when I think of how my maxi-pad purchases over the past month have stimulated the economy. I am a big part of the economic turn-around. I purchased Kotex for nostalgic reasons, Always "Infinity" for a taste of the future, and a few of store brands, with and without wings. You're welcome, American workers.
  • I found the motivation to sign up at the Federal employee gym. I easily lost the baby weight after Waffle Girl was born, but fertility-treatment-weight is a different story. I'm required to take at least a 30-min. lunch anyway, so might as well work my ass a little. I've gone once so far and have serious plans for visit #2.
  • I got to drink wine and champagne at my brother's wedding this weekend! We will do likewise, as a family, at Thanksgiving and throughout the holiday season. My wonderful new sister-in-law wants to try for a baby pretty-much right away. I told her to let me know the minute she's preggo and I'll run and schedule my FET then. This way, she'll still be a couple-few months ahead of me (she deserves the first-time mom attention!) but we'll still have kids of the same age, same school year. So even though my master plan of having a baby 2 years behind Waffle Girl has fallen through, this new master plan could be even better! It's genius, I tells ya.
I won't be posting for a little while. I started this as an infertility treatment blog and while I'm "on a break" there's not much that I'll need to get off my chest. No one needs to hear me gushing about the delightful Waffle Girl, the annoying-yet-adorable Mr. Foxy, or the great things I'm doing at my fancy government scientist job. Okay, on that last point.. I'll take this opportunity to brag that my $100K research proposal beat out a couple dozen other projects nation-wide and is now in the top 5 under final consideration. Oh yeah.

Thanks for reading my blog and for offering your support, humor, and insights. I'll keep checking in on my IF buddies in the coming weeks. And I'll let you know when we're ready to break out the frosties for another turn around the dance floor.


  1. OK sweetie. I understand the need to duck out for a while. Have fun with Waffle girl during the halloween-thanksgiving-christmas-o-rama holiday season. I hope your plans with your SIL to be pregnant at similar times work out like striking gold. Congratulations on your research proposal, I love hearing about wonderful smart funny women like yourself getting the brass ring. Take care. Many hugs - Traci

  2. YAY for your proposal!! Definitely pop back and let us all know how it turns out. (I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.)

    Love the new plan!!! I hope your SIL gets pregnant quickly so you're back in the ring again soon. I'll miss ya, but totally understand!!

  3. Ok, while I totally understand taking a breather .... selfishly, I'm going to miss your blog. Will keep you in my Reader for when you start posting again.

    Good luck with your plans, I do love your optimism, and I hope things work out as well as you're hoping for now.

  4. You've always been a great writer (yes, even in third grade) and I think you have eloquently put the feelings of some of us infertility patients into words. Thanks for the narrative. I appreciate your honesty and bravery. You are a credit to your gender!

  5. So sorry for your loss, it is truly heartbreaking. Good luck on the FET and plan.

  6. Just checking in. Missing you on the Resolve boards. I really love the idea of scheduling your FET close to your SIL! It's brilliant!

    Enjoy the holiday season, all the wine and good food!

    Wishing you all the best with a successful FET in 2010!!